Poem #2: On The Winding Lane…

Around the lamp post,

Against the gentle breeze,

I twirled and played

With the majesties.

They called out in

Their soft rustling voice,

“Come, play in this winding lane,

Away from the world of noise.”

I traced the lane,

Followed its winding path,

It led to a pond,

A tranquil little bath.

I spent those days

Daydreaming on the lane,

She spent those days

Flying higher than any plane.

Yet, I came back

To my small home,

While she spent the evenings

Within her cozy green dome.

The placid nights

Would never let me sleep,

Through that sinuous lane,

Stars’ light would seep.

On the serpentine lane,

The rats were reaped

By the proud wise owl

ย And the crows who leaped.

She would sing lullabies

So that darkness takes over my eyes,

The drowsy winding lane

Was my fantasy in disguise.

Some years later, she bade

A mourning farewell

To the priceless amity

The trees used to travel.

The lamp post still

Emits bright light,

And the stars still twinkle

In the hours of the night.

The pond also

Shall never stop

Reflecting the light,

So exquisite at the top.

But the soothing songs

Cannot be heard,

As quiet are the wings

Of the mockingbird.

The joyย and the fun are now memories

Floating on the winding lane,

What now awaits me with open hands

Is reality, struggle, and pain.

The fairytale of childhood

Remains longed for and incomplete,

Stopped by the struggles of a pauper

Who later learned to stand on her feet.

After eons of work and money

I see her, the singing belle whom I couldn’t save

And the ageless winding lane which resonates her songs

Just beneath the naked old trees, beside my grave.


Image credits: Google Images

35 Comments Add yours

  1. Richi Mittal says:

    This felt like a journey. You write beautifully.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for taking time out AGAIN!! Your words of encouragement mean a lot to me. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  2. MANISHA SINGH says:

    Amazing…

    Liked by 1 person

      1. MANISHA SINGH says:

        My pleasureโ˜บ

        Liked by 1 person

  3. floatinggold says:

    Great imaging.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. The Pensieve says:

    Nice! This flows better than the last one, although I found a few of your stanzas a bit disproportionate.

    The power of poetry lies in expressing the most of your content/emotions in the least amount of words. Hence, in the process, you can delete those words which can be assumed automatically by the reader.

    Keep writing! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading and giving such constructive advice. I’ll work at it right away. Could you elaborate a little more on how to make the stanzas more proportionate? You’ve been of great help. Thanks

      Like

      1. The Pensieve says:

        You are welcome! ๐Ÿ™‚

        About making the stanzas more proportionate….

        1. Like I said, you should skip words which really aren’t necessary/ can be assumed.

        2. Also you could try using synonyms which go more in tune with the rest of the words. Like don’t use big fancy words as they often disturb the rhyme scheme. You can go for

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Ok thank you for the advice! I will write accordingly next timeโ˜บ

        Liked by 1 person

      3. The Pensieve says:

        So…. That message got sent a little too soon…. ๐Ÿ˜…

        Anyways…. I’m pretty sure you are also aware of rhyme schemes. They are difficult to actually incorporate though. So it’s okay if your poem doesn’t fit in.

        Regarding poetry in general:- Though I know the theory, I don’t actually have that much experience. I’ve written only one poem so far named ‘My first love’. I’d really like it if you could pass it a look. ๐Ÿ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Ashley says:

    Amazing work …. you write great poems .looking forward to receiving more stuff like stories and inspirational writing

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you!โ˜บ
      About that…I’m on a tight schedule this week so I won’t actually be able to upload anything. Next week will be promising though! I’m not really that great at stories but I’ll give it a shot.โœŒ

      Like

  6. your pretty good at rhyming, Did you read this poem out loud? You have good word selection for imagery. The last stanza was pretty wordy in my humble opinion. Nevertheless, you have a talent and a skilled pen

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your words of appreciation…I’ll make sure that in future, my poems do not get too wordy.โœŒ
      And please keep giving suggestions and feedback so that I can keep improving!๐Ÿ˜€

      Liked by 1 person

  7. anikesh choudhary says:

    Great work! Keep it up!๐Ÿ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading!

      Like

  8. She says:

    Wow, such a beautiful sense of rhythm, beautifully worded, and I love the way you bring this poem full circle back to the beginning. Very nicely done, and oozing feeling!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your words…They mean a lot to me. And thank you for passing by!

      Like

      1. She says:

        My pleasure. I hope you have a lot of fun blogging!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank you! ๐Ÿ™‚

        Like

  9. theveiledfacet says:

    Mesmerizing… Beautiful ๐Ÿ˜Š

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you!โ˜บ

      Liked by 1 person

      1. theveiledfacet says:

        Welcome ๐Ÿ˜€โœŒ

        Liked by 1 person

  10. Sann says:

    Amazing. Wow! This was so so good. It was so well synced and O that flow! โค

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Sann. For reading and for your words of appreciation. You’re too kind. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  11. onahdave says:

    feels like going on an adventure…beautiful

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Onahdave. It really means a lot to me.

      Like

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